Friday, December 7, 2007

Forlorn For Lauren

Many of you (all 3 of you out there) may have noticed that we have not been blogging much likely. Chris has already pointed out that he is monstrously busy at work. I too am rather busy. Who would have thought that rewriting a 25 year old financial investment policy would be so difficult? But aside from how busy I am, I have little left to say. Until I learned of a great injustice. For you silent majoritarians out there I feel that it is my duty, my imperative, my DIVINE MISSION to inform you that our very own super-opinionated Lauren has been blocked from posting comments to our blog by her office. She has been silenced, censored, verbally castrated and it is an outrage.

I am sure that her employers felt that by silencing her they would somehow improve productivity. But what her employers, and many others either don't remember or fail to understand is that most jobs these days (and perhaps through all of history but who cares about them?) are incredibly repetitive and boring. Oh sure, some have jobs that don't make them want to stick a shotgun in their mouth and have someone put a "By Jackson Pollack" sign on the wall behind them. But most of us don't.

Back before the days of the internet, people would find diversions by talking around the water-cooler. Hell, they actually had water coolers. These days though we have the internet and with the internet comes things like instant messenger (I prefer gchat), websites that cater to seekers of useless trivia, and yes, blogs. Like this one. Who now has one less commenter.

It is almost unreasonable for employers to think that by paying their employees for 8 hours of work, they should be working all 8 of those hours. It is fair however that they expect the equivalent of 8 hours. And in order to achieve this equivalent, we need our diversions. Or else we'll fall asleep, sit there and stare blankly forward, go back to that shotgun, or (like me) torment co-workers who happen to be from other countries.

With the aid of the internet though, we can do our jobs, and when we get a little burned out find a little diversion so that our brains can readjust. Perhaps company's fear that the internet is a dangerous Siren's song that will lure us to the deadly shores of internet porn and malware while we are at work. But most of our current generation is able to resist this Siren's call because we've grown up with the internet. Some of us can't though (you know who you are out there... sickie) and they ruin the party for the rest of us.

So in response to those bastards that Lauren works for, I propose a firebombing of their offices (when Lauren isn't there). This may seem extreme but I have a personal maxim that really helps out here.

All problems can be solved with fire.


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